We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. .... --- .-- / .... .- ...- . / -.-- --- ..- / -... . . -. / ... .-.. . . .--. .. -. --. ..--.. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you. We are here for you.

We are Mountebank Health!

Please read!

Mountebank Health exists for one purpose only: to help you get better. With times like these, everyone needs someone, and We know the someone for you.

We have employed five highly trained Menders to help you wIth whatever life tosses your direction. ScheDule an appointment whenever you like (don't worry, they'll be awake).

What's a Mender? ThEy're therapists who fix you up and get you bAck on the mend!

Of course, such a resource cannot be free. Our Menders are very busy, as you can expect. Please vieW our *prices, and when you hAve decided on a payment plan, please contact MountebanK's Patient Services Department.

*prices are determined by MEnder's ability



SAM- $25 per appointment

LOU- $75 per appointment

EDD- $240 per appointment

ETA- $520 per appointment

PAL- $1000 per appointment



- DISCLAIMER -

Mountebank Health only wants to be here for you. However, if you are ever unhappy, please contact our Patient Services Department. If, for whatever reason, you want to cancel your treatment plan, SAM will tell you how.